20 January 2014

Twisted Sibling Wisdom & The Lessons We Teach

Through twisted sibling wisdom, I'd like to believe that I've bestowed my brother with a lifetime of vital knowledge. As the first born child, I inherently experience things first, granting me with a type of older sibling wisdom that can only be passed down. Thanks to me, my brother learned a few valuable lessons that only the second born child can learn...

How To Be The "Golden Child":
Just like every first born child, I was ripped-off by my number in the family line. As the first child, you automatically become family tribute, testing the unknown parental waters. You get to discover weather breaking curfew or running your mouth merits a harsher consequence as your younger siblings sit on the sidelines, taking notes. As older sister, I've bestowed Albert with a map as to what sets our parents off, so if he plays his cards right, this information will land him in the "best child" category for life.

How NOT To Break A Heart:
As the older sibling, I was not only the first to test our parents limits, but the first to try my hand at romance. Through trial and error, I learned my parents dating rules for the both of us. No tattoos, no being home alone together, and most definitely no republicans.
As the first child to set foot in the dating world, I was also the first child to experience heartbreak and my brother was there to watch me weather the storm. He watched me sob over Notebook marathons and pints of cookie dough ice cream, giving him insight into the complexity of romance.

How To Dress:
As an older sibling, I found my way to style via experimentation. My mother never questioned my multicolored sparkle pants, or fake purple hair, so there was no one there to stop me from my own embarrassment. I, however, saved by brother from a series of fashion faux pas. Despite how mean my comments may have been, I never let him out in public wearing a mixture of stripes and plaids or that velcro tee shirt with with the attachable name tag.


How To Handle Pain:
As the older sibling, we tend to use our younger siblings as our very own punching bags. It's easy to start a fight when you know that you're going to win. All those years of purple-nurples, indian rug-burns, and bites help build up my brother's pain tolerance. I'd like to think that I did him a favor.

How To Get What You Want:
Over the years, I've learned the phrases to use, the buttons to push, and found that perfect timing. But just like most things, I had to learn art of begging all by myself. I tried temper tantrums, snuck in a lie or two, toyed with playing it cool, until I found the perfect 'yes' recipe. My brother, on the other hand, learned how to get my parents to say 'yes' by using my tried and true tactics. Just like a youtube tutorial, my life gave my brother the keys to 'yes.'

As older siblings, I think we deserve some respect for giving our younger siblings a substantially less tumultuous path...

But I also owe my brother, since he's the best one around!


  1. The childhood pictures KILL ME. Love you! - kim

  2. You guys are so adorable. I'm an older sister to a brother too, and agree with all of these:)